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My essay is basicly a compare and contrast essay between the two British Authors: Mary Wroth and Robert Herrick. You don’t need to know them to help me out though

Here’s what I’ve got so far (as brainstorm):
I’ll be concentrating on the concept of Carpe Diem (live every moment like it’s your last) Like how some authors (Herrick) encourage it, while others like Mary Wroth would see it as degrading to women in the sense that they would be brought down compared to men if they were to even think of acting in that way. Maybe on her point of view, to follow Carpe Diem is impossible for women of the time and not true love?

I also want to argue that from Wroth’s point of view, she argues that love’s like a poison dart, because it brings one to lose control and it’s quite unexpected. To her, it is also a negative thing since it tends to bring with it a sort of loss of consistency (rarely do people stick to one person)… aka loss of true virtue while the other author sees love as being a liberating thing that needs no consistency.

Wroth is trying to say that she wants consistency in love and she feels like she had no choice in falling in love. Those are the two things that stick out in her poems… she doesn’t seem to want to be in love and according to my teacher, consistency is virtue (its basically remaining a virgin until you are with the only ONE you’ll ever be with and are therefore married…)

Then I have to compare her with another poet who’s all about Carpe Diem (very erotic poetry, writing about his many mistresses and the beauty their bodies. He writes about how they should just have sex while they still can; just have some fun and bed as many women as he can.)

In that time, women NEEDED to be chaste to be virtuous and worthy of praise and the love of a good man. But men didn’t need to be chaste to have virtue and be considered noble or virtuous. Mary Wroth (the author), wants to promote equality in a sense, saying that the fact of that men don’t need to be chaste to be virtuous isn’t right. They should have the same definition of noble and virtuous as women do.

If I could relate this essay to feminism that’d be awesome XD Because this author was a bit of a feminist… she sees true love as being Aphrodite while cupid is a nuisance…
Aphrodite is consistency -> female, while cupid is inconsistence -> male.
"Cupid’s" version of love vs. Apherdite’s version?
The child version of love versus the adult version?
Basicly the immature version (Cupid) vs. the matured version of love (Aphrodite)
I mean cupid is this little baby that throws arrows around like they’re candy

I need another person’s perspective, lol! (I get all my ideas when bouncing off someone else… almost like when I have to explain it to someone else, I come to understand it better myself)

Thanks for the help!!!

Women in Poems by Wroth and Herrick

Robert Herrick and Lady Mary Wroth treat women very differently in their poems. Herrick’s poems focus on the external qualities of women, and Wroth’s poems examine women’s internal world – their thoughts and feelings. In addition, Herrick finds the social codes that govern women’s behavior are natural and appropriate. By contrast, Wroth argues that these rules are not natural at all but are rather conventions that oppress women. Perhaps the most significant example of divergence of the two perspectives of women concerns love: Herrick’s suggest a women’s experience of love is pleasurable and grounded in external, physical attraction, but Wroth finds love to be a painful and a mostly internal, mental experience. In my analysis of their poems with attention to these three features – the poet’s external or internal treatment of women, the poet’s view of the social roles assigned to women, and the poet’s perspective of what love is for women – I will reveal that Herrick, while not bashing women as many seventeenth-century commentators did, does objectify women by viewing them purely for their external features. Furthermore, by presenting male speakers who direct women’s behaviors without considering their thoughts and feelings, Herrick contributes to the societal habit of oppressing women. Meanwhile, an examination of Wroth’s poems will show that she attempts to liberate women from suffering and oppression by challenging several sexist traditions: She turns the tables on male poets by objectifying men in her poems; she reverses many Petrarchan traditions, most importantly by asserting that women frequently suffer in love at the hands of cruel men, and not vice versa; she challenges the belief commonly held in the seventeenth century that men are intellectually and morally superior to women; and she calls attention to other social norms, such as the restriction of the women to inside the home, that oppress women.

http://www.cbu.edu/Academics/honors/hj2k3_women.htm

Here’s my brainstorm so far, any questions that would help further my brainstorming would be amazing help!!!

well Im gonna argue that one author says that loves a prison because it brings one to lose control which brings loss of consistency… aka loss of true virtue while the other author sees love as being a liberating thing that needs no consistency

(poison dart) she’d trying to say that she wants consistency in love and she feels like she had no choice in falling in love. those are the two things that stick out in her poems… she doesn’t seem to want to be in love and according to my teacher, consistency is virtue (its basicly remaining a virgin until you are with the only ONE you’ll ever be with…)
and then I have to compare her with another poet who’s all about Carpe Diem, have some fun, bed as many women as you can

if we could relate this to feminism thatd be awesome XD cuz this author was a bit of a feminist… she sees true love as being aphrodite while cupid is a nuisance… Aphrodite is consistency -> female, while cupid is inconsistence -> male. In that time, women NEEDED to be chast to be virtuous and worthy of praise and love of a good man. But men didnt need to be chast to have virtue and be consider noble or virtuous

(this is some of the stuff I understood in class and through what little I found on the net)

Mary Wroth (the author), wants to promote equality in a sense, saying that the fact
of that men dont need to be chast to be virtuous isn’t right. They should have the same definition of noble and virtuous as women do.

the other author, Robert Herrick, is very erotic in his poetry, writting about his many mistresses and the beauty their bodies. He writes about how they should just have sex while they still can.

maybe I could concentrate on the actual concept of Carpe Diem? Like how some authors (Herrick) encourage it, while others like Mary Wroth would see it as degrading to women in the sense that they would be brought down compared to men if they were to even think of acting in that way? Maybe on her point of view, to follow Carpe Diem is impossible for women of the time and not true love?

like it’s "cupid’s" version of love, not apherdite’s version?
The child version of love versus the adult version?
well kinda like the immature version (cupid) vs. the matured version of love (aphrodite)
I mean cupid is this little baby that throws arrows around like they’re candy

I need another person’s perspective, lol! (funny how I get all my ideas when bouncing off someone else… almost like when I have to explain it to someone else, I come to understand it better myself, lol!

I’ll take this on…but it will take me about 30 minutes or so so check back ( slow typer here). Very interesting topic.

OK.

In the beginning, you say someone says love is like a prison because they can lose control. Prison is all about control. Do you mean that she wants to be in a controlled environment so she feels safer to lose control? Thus, when she loses control, she behaves outside her usual routine. Is she afraid of routine or unpredictabitly? That she will look like she is not consistent in her beliefs and actions, and look like a fool or hypocrite? Does she fear not being true to herself at all times? Then, the second author. She sees love as having no boundaries….and then I hear you saying someone wishes to control love, not be controlled by it.
And someone else says if you try and control love, you have missed the point of it. Being free of cupid is saying you want the sex but not the commitment. You want the love but not the pain. Usually men want the sex, not the commitment. But not always. In regards to feminism, there is a double standard that men "sow their wild oats" and this is healthy and expected; in a female, it’s sluttiness. I guess that cupid is "lust" and Aphrodite is "love" (commitment). So what is your view? Should we have both sexes equal as in…both should sow their wild oats before settling down? Or should both sexes behave chastly before marraige? In the original Greek myths, I think Cupid was meant to make couples fall in love and commit. Aphrodite was about sexuality (lust). Aphrodite has two beginnings, but one is she was born out of the sea, of no parents, and was so beautiful the three Graces brought her to Mount Olympus where she was made a Goddess. Zeus married her to Hephaestius, and she bore Eros, later named Cupid. Eros shot arrows of love into the hearts of unwary victims, while he laughed, mockingly. Lots of twists in these old myths.

There’s this girl, see – of course there is!!

When I met her, I was awestruck! She is the most exquisite creature! We’re both 30-ish.

That was a year ago. I was married at the time, in the process of a divorce. I finally got divorced in January, but didn’t date anyone.

Her and I work at a volunteer centre. We see each other only about once a week or so.

Initially, her and I would just say Hi at a distance… Sometime later, we went on a skills training course. She chose to sit next to me most of the time. At the end of the course, I told her what a lovely person I thought she is and I hope we get to work together for much longer. She complimented me back, said the broke the mould when they made me… Then we hugged. My heart raced!

Back at the centre, we’d hug every week when greeting each other and saying goodbye. The hugs were short at first, but gradually became longer, tighter hugs. Soon after, she gave me a peck on my cheek – she initiated that…

After 3 weeks of this, I noticed our pecks getting closer to our lips, until 2 weeks ago, our lips touched at the sides – briefly!

Then one week, I felt cheeky and kissed her straight on the lips, which she didn’t dodge. It was really just a quick sort of friendly kiss (peck) on the lips, followed by a mutually tight squeeze.

The next week though, she seemed "in" on the lips thing and aimed straight for mine as I did hers. We shared quite a tight, long-ish hug. Then we realised the centre’s lights were off, so we went to switch them off. We came out, she moved to me. We kissed again, not too quick, but more than a peck and hugged tight again!

We have been greeting each other like this for near on 5 months now.

THEN, TODAY, I summed up some courage, took the Red Pill and told her how ardently I love her. It was so awesome and liberating, telling her! Man, she turns my life into 3-d HIGH DEFINITION! Her voice sounds like warm honey and soft silk. I actually wish she would read this and know I am serious – but Yahoo Answers isn’t her sort of thing

Anyway, she was a bit taken aback, since I have been trying to convince her (and myself) for a year now that my feelings for her are just plutonic – but they are not. I ADORE her! I find the idea of being with any other woman utterly repugnant. She replied, saying I am such a sweet guy. However, she said she is still very much in love with her 1st boyfriend that she broke up some 4 years ago with. She also said that I am too nice for her and she prefers different kind of guys. Like bad boy types, I guess.

But, more than this, it sounded to me like she was just trying to find excuses. She said she isn’t good enough for me, that she cannot love me the way I need and want to be loved. Said she is quite a b*tch sometimes and an utter cow. To be sure, she probably does have a bit of a temper – but don’t we all? I am not perfect by any stretch!

She said she wants to remain friends. I am, of course, happy with this – as I’d rather have her as a plutonic friend than not at all! GASP! I’d rather rip my beating heart out and stomp it into the ground than not have her in my life at all!

SO, WHAT IS THIS?? I am completely smitten with her. She doesn’t often communicate with me in the week, though it has actually picked up in recent times and we often speak on the phone for like 30-40 minutes!! Could it be that she has feelings for me, but is trying to be careful? Or are we just friends? Is she playing hard-to-get? Is she nervous that I came out of a divorce?

Or what? I’m really new and quite stupid at all this relationship/ feeling stuff, as only ever had 1 girlfriend that I got married to and we are now divorced…

OR, could it ultimately just be that I do not make her heart go boom, like she does mine?

I can’t believe what I’m reading. If she kisses and hugs you, that to me sounds like she is interested in you as more than a friend. But then you confide in her and tell her how you feel (which is understandable given how she has acted towards you) and then she is taken aback?

What kind of a bitch is this? She clearly gives you indications that she likes you as more than a friend. Who would kiss somebody they are just friends with?

Then she tells you she’s still in love with some other guy. I don’t know what to tell you. I think I might be in a similar situation, but it’s too hard to tell.

Sounds like she’s fu*king with you. Like she’s trying to drive you nuts. Either that, or she’s just a misleading bitch.

My suggestion is this. Don’t play right into her hands. Be somewhat distant, be a challenge. Then watch her come crawling back to you on her hands and knees.

Think about it. Liberals want to keep the status quo: An ever-growing government, entitlement programs galore and irresponsible/reckless spending.

Conservatives (not the ones in office necessarily) want things to change. They want the markets to be relaxed. They want way less government. They want the people to be liberated from the government.

Am I right or am I right?

*Note: whether you are a liberal or not, I am right since liberals don’t like to use words to their legitimate definition. Right is wrong in liberalspeak. So, I am right any which way.

Don’t waste your time answering!

You are right.
However, liberation from the government is not the liberation liberals want. They want to liberate money from the wallets of any and all who are better off than them, simple as that. That is the ONLY liberation liberals stand for.

‘ If you want to get something said in the politics tell a man. If you want to get something done in the politics tell a woman’ — Margaret Thacher

"Feminism is built on believing women’s accounts of sexual use and abuse by men." — Catharine MacKinnon

"All sex, even consensual sex between a married couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." Catherine MacKinnon

"All men are rapists and that’s all they are" — Marilyn French Author, "The Women’s Room" (quoted again in People Magazine) "All men are rapists and that’s all they are …" –Feminist Marilyn French, People Magazine (Percent of reported rape or near-rape incidents = .07% [The FBI's Uniform Crime Report lists for the year 1996])

"[Rape] is nothing more or less than a conscious process of intimidation by which ALL MEN KEEP ALL WOMEN IN A STATE OF FEAR" [emphasis added] — Susan Brownmiller (Against Our Will p. 6)

"Marriage as an institution developed from rape as a practice. Rape, originally defined as abduction, became marriage by capture. Marriage meant the taking was to extend in time, to be not only use of but possession of, or ownership." — Andrea Dworkin.

"Heterosexual intercourse is the pure, formalized expression of contempt for women’s bodies." — Andrea Dworkin

"Romance is rape embellished with meaningful looks." Andrea Dworkin in the Philadelphia Inquirer, May 21, 1995..

"Under patriarchy, no woman is safe to live her life, or to love, or to mother children. Under patriarchy, every woman is a victim, past, present, and future. Under patriarchy, every woman’s daughter is a victim, past, present, and future. Under patriarchy, every woman’s son is her potential betrayer and also the inevitable rapist or exploiter of another woman," Andrea Dworkin, Liberty, p.58..

"One can know everything and still be unable to accept the fact that sex and murder are fused in the male consciousness, so that the one without the imminent possibly of the other is unthinkable and impossible." Andrea Dworkin, Letters from a War Zone, p. 21..

"In every century, there are a handful of writers who help the human race to evolve. Andrea is one of them."–Gloria Steinem

"And if the professional rapist is to be separated from the average dominant heterosexual [male], it may be mainly a quantitative difference." — Susan Griffin "Rape: The All-American Crime"
(p. 86)

"When a woman reaches orgasm with a man she is only collaborating with the patriarchal system, eroticizing her own oppression…" — Sheila Jeffrys

"I claim that rape exists any time sexual intercourse occurs when it has not been initiated by the woman, out of her own genuine affection and desire." — Robin Morgan, "Theory and Practice: Pornography and Rape" in "Going to Far," 1974.

"Who cares how men feel or what they do or whether they suffer? They have had over 2000 years to dominate and made a complete hash of it. Now it is our turn. My only comment to men is, if you don’t like it, bad luck – and if you get in my way I’ll run you down." — Letter to the Editor: "Women’s Turn to Dominate" — Signed: Liberated Women, Boronia — Herald-Sun, Melbourne, Australia – 9 February 1996

Toward a Feminist Theory of the State. Catharine A. MacKinnon, 1989, First Harvard University Press (paperback in 1991) [a legal treatise comparing and contrasting feminism with COMMUNISM AND SOCIALISM]

"It is not only men convicted of rape who believe that the only thing they did that was different from what men do all the time is get caught."

"If sexuality is central to women’s definition and forced sex is central to sexuality, rape is indigenous, not exceptional, to women’s social condition."

"Under law, rape is a sex crime that is not regarded as a crime when it looks like sex. The law, speaking generally, defines rape as intercourse with force or coercion and without consent., Like sexuality under male supremacy, this definition assumes the sadomasochistic definition of sex: intercourse with force or coercion can be or become consensual."

"Compare victims’ reports of rape with women’s reports of sex. They look a lot alike….[T]he major distinction between intercourse (normal) and rape (abnormal) is that the normal happens so often that one cannot get anyone to see anything wrong with it." Catherine MacKinnon, quoted in Christina Hoff Sommers, "Hard-Line Feminists Guilty of Ms.-Representation," Wall Street Journal, November 7, 1991.

"The institution of sexual intercourse is anti-feminist" — Ti-Grace Atkinson "Amazon Odyssey" (p. 86)

"In a patriarchal society all heterosexual intercourse is rape because women, as a gr

"All sex, even consensual sex between a married couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." Catherine MacKinnon

muahaha,they make me laugh so much when they don’t make make sense.Why don’t they just sew their vaginas along with their mouth?

It’s just so funnyto hear those kinds of people say shit like these.
In a few years they’ll tell us that having a woman get up from the couch is abusing her.ahahahaha

What has the world come to,now I’m really worried about the children that will be brought up in such a world.

Definition of invasion :An invasion is a military offensive consisting of all, or large parts of the armed forces of one geopolitical entity aggressively entering territory controlled by another such entity, generally with the objective of either conquering, liberating or re-establishing control or authority over a territory, forcing the partition of a country, altering the established government or gaining concessions from said government, or a combination thereof. An invasion can be the cause of a war, beas a part of a larger strategy to end a war, or it can constitute an entire war in itself. Due to the large scale of the operations associated with invasions, they are usually strategic in planning and execution.

Then, why they want to use that term?. Is it used on purpose to create hostility against poor people who are coming to this country when they are not really invading? Is that term mostly used by supremacist groups when they want to create hate against certain groups?

Thanks, and have a beautiful day.

its not an invasion when employers welcome them, when people hire them to cut grass, do their landscaping, watch their kids, clean their houses, fix their houses, flip their burgers, debone the chicken they buy in stores, fix their food at restaurants
. its not an invasion when farmers seek them out because they can not find enough people to work the fields and the visa programs don’t give them enough people

illegals are obviously welcomed and encouraged to come
its not an "invasion"
people who say that are just xenophobes

“For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move.” – Robert Louis Stevenson
Studying abroad will liberate my mind from the prism of American chauvinism. The exposure and experiences I will garner studying abroad will allow me to grow as an Independent thinker.
I have never left the United States. My morals, customs, ethics and ideologies are all reinforced by American culture. My morals can be found in books from American writers such as Toni Morrison, Jonathan Kozol, and James Baldwin. My daily customs telecasted on MTV in documentary format also known as “reality shows”. My ethics parallel to comedians Bill Mahr and Jon Stewart. My ideologies are reflected on blogging sites such as the Huffington Post. I feel secluded to an extent. Never leaving this country has trapped me in this box of liberal conformity. It is time for me to step out of comfort zone and into a place of unfamiliarity.
Living in another country gives me an opportunity to explore not only a foreign land but myself as a human being. Studying abroad will broaden my horizons. It will allow me to reevaluate the way I see the world. This is crucial for a better understanding of the ambiguous. What is normal? What is respect? What is beauty? What is art? What is justice? What is rational? These questions sound simple but are very complex. For instance, a hermit could never answer these questions. Their worlds are too predicated on conventionality. Their definition of beauty, art, respect, and justice are completely subjective to their immediate environment, and is therefore inadequate. Having a more objective view on life will allow me to have a better appreciation for life.
Spain is the ideal place to study abroad. Its deep history, sophisticated culture, and most importantly great food, allows it to stand hand and knees over other countries in Europe. I plan on living it up in Spain. Just thinking about the Seville Cathedral and its creative Gothic design as well as its deep roots in Catholicism sends chills down my spine. Witnessing the bravery, heart, and excitement of bullfighting will be exhilarating. The Flamenco is the most fascinating part of Spanish Culture. Everything from the dance, the harmonics to the singing intrigues me.
Going to college it is not just about learning out of book but also learning through experiences. Studying abroad is one of the few learning experiences college student have that will stick with them for the rest of their lives. Traveling broadens the mind. It allows students to experience other ways of living and thinking that will enrich them as human beings.

Reads like a poet trying to capture essence into a form ill suited. Too much metaphor, watch verb tense (will give rather than gives). Simple sentences at the beginning are choppy and a bit annoying.

creating a new contract to replace the first
A Novation is a new agreement and is recognized in the law. The definition of Novation from Bouvier’s 1856 law dictionary illustrates:

NOVATION, civil law. 1. Novation is a substitution of a new for an old debt. The old debt is extinguished by the new one contracted in its stead; a novation may be made in three different ways, which form three distinct kinds of novations.

2. , The first takes place, without the intervention of any new person, where a debtor contracts a new engagement with his creditor, in consideration of being liberated from the former. This kind has no appropriate name, and is called a novation generally.

Your Novation Contract substitutes a new debt (zero) and a new engagement for the one claimed by the credit card company.

EVERY credit card company uses the novation contract process. Any time you get a Notice of an update to the terms and conditions of your credit card agreement, this update is in fact an offer to enter into a novation contract (a new agreement). When you use the credit card after receiving the new update, you have agreed to the new terms. Your act of using the card is an acceptance of the new agreement. How else could they change your credit card agreement? Insurance companies use this also, such as when you have a claim for $20,000 for damage and they send you $3,000.

YOUR CARD DISPUTE AND NOVATION

You can use the same process to enter into a new agreement with a card company, under your terms and conditions, by making the company an offer, which it can accept with an act. Simply, you send the card company a check for some amount, say $25, with the stated condition that by accepting the check, it agrees to your new terms and conditions (your Novation Contract). When the card company accepts the check by cashing it, it has agreed to your new Novation Contract. And you eliminate credit card debt in a simple, legal procedure. Get out of debt by using their law to your advantage.

Your notice of debt dispute and Novation Contract is designed to do the following:

(1) Bind your credit card company to the terms and conditions of your Novation Contract which include but are not limited to:

a) the cancellation of any and all prior in-force agreements;

b) its admission that the debt and all prior agreements are now paid in full;

c) its waiver of all claimed right of arbitration against you;

d) its obligation to report the account in dispute as “paid as agreed” to credit reporting agencies;

e) its agreement to not take any collection activity against you and to inform any assignees of the account that it has agreed that the account is “paid as agreed”;

f) the requirement that it verify under oath the amount of debt you allegedly owe in any correspondence to you; and

g) its agreement that any breach of the terms of the Novation Contract by them will injure and damage you and that it will be liable for all damages;

(2) Upon notice, bind any and all collection agents of your credit card company and third party collection companies to your Novation Contract;.

(3) Establish a legal basis for a claim of zero liability for the disputed credit card account;

(4) Establish a legal basis for declaring invalid any and all allegations of debt made against you that are associated with the credit card account and sent through the U.S. mails;

(5) Establish a legal basis for claiming injuries and damages should the credit card company or any collection agency breach the terms and conditions of your Novation Contract; and,

(6) Destroy any legal basis for the credit card company or any collection agent to ignore your card dispute and Novation Contract by your:

a) choosing and using a procedure permitted and recognized by contract common law, the Uniform Commercial Code, the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act, and the Fair Credit Reporting Act;

b) establishing the card company’s obligation and third party collector’s obligation to verify under oath the amount of any debt they allege you owe;

c) removing any controversy between your demand for verification of any alleged debt and any and all presentments by third parties containing unverified allegations of debt against you; and,

d) removing any presumption that you willfully avoided a known debt.

They are not stupid. They will not accept a check that you send "with the stated condition that by accepting the check, it agrees to your new terms and conditions (your Novation Contract)." When the card company rejects the check by not cashing it, it has reject to your new Novation Contract, and it will charge you a late fee because of your failure to send a check without conditions. And they keep you in credit card debt in a simple, legal procedure.

i know this may seem common sense but really, if you think about it, humility doesnt always come naturally for some people. I have a stubborn nature and I was brought up very confident and elevating myself due to experiences and upbringing…but as I grew older, I realized that a lot of my sufferings inside (jealousy, insecurity etc) are a result of my "ego" or self or pride..sense of entitlement, or the desire to be the "best" at whatever, and wanting the men I date to see me that way…resulting to insecurity or jealousy unnecessarily. The question is, I have been contemplating a lot about my life and one of the things I want to start w/ is to learn to be humble. I am finally in a place in my life where I would definitely like this to happen. I just had a baby, and I am in a great relationship w/ a man who I emotionally and spiritually connect with..and I really want to change some of my ways in a positive way bec. it is due time that I do so..little by little of course. This guy brings out a lot of emotions and feelings in me..maybe not him per se but the feeling of vulnerability of being in love w/ someone so much, and not wanting to lose them. I dont know if this makes any sense..but how do I achieve this humility. How do I get my spirituality back? I am feeling a bit unsettled about myself. I know I have a lot of great qualities but humility will get me to the next level but I’ve forgotten how to start getting there…. please help.
– According to Wikipedia, here’s one of the definitions of humility:
In Buddhism, humility is equivalent to concern of how to be liberated from the sufferings of life and the vexations of the human mind. The ultimate aim is to achieve a state of enlightenment through meditation and other spiritual practices. Humility can also result from achieving the liberation of Nirvana. When one experiences the ultimate Emptiness and non-self, one is free from suffering, vexations and all illusions of self-deception. Humility, compassion and wisdom characterize this state of enlightenment.

"Nietzsche wrote of humility (not to speak of patience, wisdom, and any other virtue lauded widely by the masses) as a weakness, a false virtue which concealed the frailties and hidden crookedness in its holder."

I don’t have to let what she did destroy or hold my life in limbo at the point and time all this crap hit the fan. I feel liberated from so many painful feelings, by taking my life back. I think I thought I could not do anything to get free from the memories that I was supposed to work out forgiving so I could then release it peacefully. What I think now with all the help you people gave me is I don’t have to stay there in the muck she created, that is her life not mine, I can live my life without her definitions,choices,beliefs,ideas,thoughts,actions, from that moment. That I don’t have to let that crap decide my day or stop me from living right NOW for the rest of my life. I will not let what you did or said be with me anymore, I want to live now and not then, you were a loser and a loser does not get to hold me back from living or make me question my self worth or value. A loser is a loser not a wife or friend, I don’t want to manage the damage control dept. in my heart for you anymore or rate you as viable source of influence.(to my wife in the past)You cannot have my tender openness or smash my sand castles anymore.You were a thoughtless mean uncaring loser and you don’t deserve the time I have spent pouring over your words and deeds. Losers leave love, family, losers lie and cheat,losers crush and mangle their spouses.Losers say they never wanted children,losers have sex with a person infected with herpes while they are married and nursing,losers abandon family.I don’t have to and I am not going to give you the time of day anymore loser!! Obviously you did not love me or these children, or yourself and that is really sad.I am not going to ache cry wish morn hope wrestle beg plead , I am not going there anymore for every. Goodbye pain goodbye sadness, hello new day.

I did nothing, it was actually you and you alone who made the decision to move on and therefore you deserve all the credit. Well done!